No has ever said that motherhood is dignified. I am sure that if you spoke with any mother, they would tell you that it is quite the opposite. Dealing with diaper blow outs and projectile vomit, there is no shortage of bodily fluids to be covered in at any given time. I have handled exploding poop in public, leaving the house with vomit in my hair and down my shirt, and I have cleaned up after my fair share of poop-ocalypses.

But, nothing will top the moment of hearing the words, “Excuse me Miss, you seem to be leaking”

There I am, waiting in line to get a coffee, on a particular day when I didn’t actually have my child with me, being told that my boobs were leaking. By a complete stranger. And when I say leaking, I don’t mean a little damp spot on my top. I mean, I had two very distinct growing circles of wet right in the middle of my grey sweater.

Leaking boob juice and I have become rather good friends, it seems. In fact, I am one of those incredibly lucky women who happen to have a very overactive let down –

seriously, I could spray someone from across the room

– and more often than not I wake up to wet sheets from having leaked at some point during the night. Even with the many breastmilk mishaps that I’ve had, I have to say that I have never quite accomplished the feat of soaking through breast pads, a nursing bra, a tank top, and a sweater without even having the slightest inclination that it was happening until that moment.

The idea that motherhood has desensitized me from the feeling of being damp so much so that I could not notice the giant patches of boob juice leaking through the front of my shirt, scares the living daylights out of me.

I mean come on, my shirt was soaked. How in the world did I not notice?

And my goodness could I have been more embarrassed?

I had no idea how to respond or to react to this perfectly polite stranger informing me of my tremendously unfortunate situation in the middle of a very busy coffee shop. I did the only thing that I could think of – grab my coffee, smile, shrug my shoulders, and say

I’m a mom. You’d be surprised at how often stuff like this happens.

No one has ever said that Motherhood is dignified but they have also never said it was dull. It is a journey that will keep you on your toes. As soon as you think you might have a handle on it – everything changes. When poop hits the fan, or when motherhood starts to eat you alive, it is important that you do your best to keep a sense of humour.

Parenthood is much easier to navigate that way

 

Kassi is a new mother, a crafter, a roller derby player and blogger. Together with her bearded partner and their pup, they are navigating parenthood one poopsplosion at a time. Read all about their hilarious parenting adventures and mishaps and her journey as a newbie blogger at www.milesandellie.com

 

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