Oh the pleasure it brings me to witness my son’s sense of wonderment and appreciation of the world. The ability that he has to embrace the good in every person is refreshing. The capacity to sense safety in all environments; inspirational. He is innocent and pure.
For me, this innocence is one of the most beautiful things about Motherhood. To witness our children as human beings unscathed; open, raw, vulnerable, trusting…what a gift. As beautiful as this purity is, we know deep down that things change. We can’t control it, so we wish the best for our children. And, naturally our list of dreams to come true are miles long.
Here are my top 3 wishes for my child
Compassion
It amazes me how children, by nature, are compassionate. When I am sad, my son’s intellect communicates that something isn’t right. In our mother/child relationship, our message of healing currently comes through breastfeeding. This is how I offer compassion and how he seeks comfort when he is hurt or sick.
Not long ago I hurt myself. I felt immediate pain, walked away quickly, wincing and crying out. Gabriel came to me and climbed in my lap. He pulled my tank top down and began to nurse. His little heart told him that what comforts him, will bring comfort to Mommy.
Compassion is kindness, kindness is selflessness, selflessness is generosity, and generosity is beauty
Sense of Self
Gabriel knows what he likes
At 16 months old, my son knows what television programs he enjoys. His love for breastmilk, tea, and bananas are no secret. He recognizes who he is and what he wants in only the way a child can. His reality has meaning and purpose because it is filled with the people and things he loves. Life offers him a sense of security that he can be himself without judgment. This safety assists his growth and builds his confidence. And it comes from believing he can do anything.
As the saying goes “If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything.” Without sense of self this statement is very true. I do not wish this for Gabriel. How unfortunate would it be for his identity to be found in the opinions of others? How disheartening it would be to see him follow the crowd. For him, I want the courage to stand tall in who he was created to be.
While there are many characteristics that I wish for my child, compassion and a sense of self are two traits I pray define his character. But, there is one above all the rest that I want for him now until his dying breath and that is…
Love
Gabriel meeting a baby for the very first time.
“…the greatest of these is love…” If my son offers you his food, it is because he loves you. If he runs to you or smiles when you walk into the room, it is because he loves you. Physical touch and gifts are ways he reaches out to share affection. As you know, physical touch and gift giving are actions.
How many hearts are broken because we have been told “I love you” only to be let down by opposing actions?
In a world where we throw the word love around loosely. I wish for true and honest love to permeate and saturate my son’s heart and soul.I hope that it is so strong, that it has no choice but to seep out and overflow onto others. But, I wish this in a way that is governed by his actions and not just words.
Yes, love can hurt. It can hurt to give and be rejected. The wound burns if love isn’t reciprocated. There are times when love feels like it is taking our heart and ripping it from the ligaments that holds it in place. Love can be hard.
But I wish love more than anything, because love can heal and restore. Love can move mountains. It can bring people out of the deepest pit of depression. Love changes lives, puts others first, and gives selflessly. Love always wins.
And while my wish list for Gabriel runs miles long, if he is never granted but a few, I pray it to be these three.
Because with kindness, sense of self, and love…we all can change the world…and I most certainly believe that he can.
Rachel is a mom, writer, & advocate for women at her local crisis pregnancy center. She lives in South Georgia where she raises her son alongside her husband. She is currently in training to become a Certified Breastfeeding Counselor.
