Seriously.
I have an almost 2-year old and a 5 week old. Currently, I am on maternity leave. At first, I thought, ‘Oh, I’ll use this time to get used to the stay-at-home-mom life and prepare for the future.”
I made plans to clean out the garage and organize things to have a garage sale. learning how to sew, finally starting on the scrapbooks and baby books, and I planned on completely rearranging and decorating the master bedroom. I figured, once I became a SAHM, after my contract in the military was up, I’d have so much time to do things.
What the heck was I thinking?!
I barely have time to do laundry! I’m not even joking. Last week, it took me 3 days to finish laundry. Wash, dry, sort, fold…not to mention putting clothes away. Soon a whole week will go by before my laundry gets put away!
From the moment my kids and I get up for the day- to when my husband comes home from work…nothing gets done. Nothing that has to do with housework or taking care of mom, that is.
I spend half the day soothing one crying baby, or another. If I am not dealing with crying children, I am protecting the newborn from the flying objects my almost 2 year old is throwing. Turns out, he’s got a good arm.
Besides that, I’m nursing, changing, rocking, snuggling, and protecting said newborn. Or I am playing, reading, teaching, changing, chasing, tickling, hugging, feeding, or laying my son to sleep.
When does a mom get some time? During naps?
I saw this photo on Facebook and thought,
Holy crap. This is my life.”
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It’s true! Naptime, bedtime, doesn’t matter. Do we stay awake to get things? OR we stay awake to catch up on this week’s episode of Grey’s….or to watch all 6 hours of the new Gilmore Girls. Then when one kid wakes up, you have pause your free-time, and you’re back to being mom. Hey, I’m not complaining- but I’m definitely learning more and more about how to manage my time…and how bad at it I am.
Then dad comes home.
Don’t get too excited. He’s worked all day and he’s tired too. And if you’re ANYTHING like ME, you’ll feel bad for asking him to do things for you or to help you. So you just take on everything yourself. Lucky for me, my husband is more of the cook around here and he helps with that…and he does dishes too. And he’s hot. Sorry ladies, he’s all mine.
What boggles my mind the most though, is when my husband stays alone with the kids.
For instance, the other day I went to the gym for the first time since having my daughter. He seemed fine when I got back! He didn’t seem frazzled nor . Maybe because I was only gone only a little over an hour- or maybe he’s really that good! Newborn was asleep, toddler was playing well by himself, house wasn’t a COMPLETE disaster, and my husband is watching TV. What?!
Then you have other days where it’s hard enough to pick up the toys. Or the days where your kids are clingy and only want mommy. Okay. The newborn can’t help that. But with both kids attached to you, suddenly that a bottle of moscato sounds reaaaaalllly good at 1 PM… Thank goodness then your husband comes home to rescue you. So you leave for a while to get a coffee and do some grocery shopping, or even just go on a walk. And then you come home.
“Hey honey, how was it with the kids?”
“Great! the dishes are done, I did a couple of loads of laundry, our son is napping, the toys are cleaned up and I’m just relaxing. Oh, and dinner is in the oven. I could do this all day.”
Shut the front door. Anyone else feel like this?!
Sure, I know what you’re all thinking.
‘Gee, this mom is complaining a lot about not having time for things but here she is writing a blog entry instead of doing the laundry that takes her 3 days to finish.’
Joke’s on you. This post took me 5 evenings to write at 10pm or so every night…while nursing my newborn to sleep! So, ha!
The point of this is…someday I’m going to figure it out. And then life is going to throw me another curveball and I’m going to go crazy again. I’m not sure how a lot of other moms do this but more power to them. They have perfectly clean houses (and kids), they workout all the time (I envy you, I love the gym), cook for their husbands, and have their hair and makeup done. Go you! You glamorous and amazing being! I will be in your shoes one day!
But until that day comes, I’ll be the mom with the sweatpants, the “mom bun,” and the two babies in diapers only because…I still haven’t finished the laundry.
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A 27 year old from Wisconsin but currently stationed in California with a happy marriage and two rainbow babies. Abigail is currently in the Navy and is also a certified personal trainer. I am a kinesiology major who plans to use her knowledge to help her do more in the fitness industry. She’s a breastfeeding, cloth diapering, essential oil using, gym freak, babywearing, kind of mom. Abigail loves empowering and encouraging women to be who they are and to take pride in that.
Great article! I did not think you were complaining, just telling about reality. I don’t know anyone who does it all, don’t feel like you should be able to! This season is so, so hard. So glad that your husband helps a lot. It’s so important! Sending love and support your way. You’re doing great mama!