We produce “liquid gold”, a perfect food for our babies. But to many women, breastfeeding doesn’t just happen. In fact, it can be difficult and frustrating. From an improper latch to sore, painful nipples, there are many challenges women can face while establishing a breastfeeding relationship with her newborn. Despite how badly I wanted to breastfeed there were many days I could have just thrown in the towel and given up.

I was lucky to have a strong support system. I had an amazing lactation specialist, a husband who understood my breastfeeding goals, and mommy friends who had experience. But sometimes I think friends, family and spouses assume there’s nothing they can do to help a new mom when breastfeeding isn’t going well. They might feel helpless when a new mama is crying because her baby won’t latch, or breastfeeding is painful. But actually, friends and family play a pivotal role in a mother’s life! Their support can actually affect how long a mother decides to breastfeed. Here are a few ways others can help a struggling mom:

1. Help her find resources for help.

A mother with a newborn is exhausted and weary. She may have forgotten tips and tricks she learned from friends and her breastfeeding class. Help her schedule an appointment with a lactation specialist, and offer to watch her other children while she goes to her appointment. Find her local La Leche League on Facebook so she can attend meet ups or talk with other breastfeeding mamas from the comfort of her own home. Facebook is especially useful for those late nights when she is the only one awake in the house, but wants to reach out to other moms that understand. Encourage her to seek help from trained professionals and other experienced women.

2. Be her cheerleader.

Remind her of what a great job she’s doing. Tell her what a wonderful mommy she is. Breastfeeding is a very personal experience, and women can feel less-than-adequate when they have difficulty. We are told what a “natural” process it is, so when it doesn’t come “naturally” it can feel like a failure! The first few weeks are hard and can feel very lonely. Offer words of encouragement so she feels loved and supported during this difficult time.

3. Bring her snacks and water.

It’s easy to forget to keep yourself fed and hydrated when you are caring for a newborn around the clock. It’s even harder when you have additional children to care for. Simple, easy-to-make snacks are essential to mothers with newborns. Nursing moms need water to produce milk, and they need to increase their calories consumed to compensate for those burned while breastfeeding!

4. Offer to do other chores around the house.

Breastfeeding is a full-time job in itself, so other household chores feel like huge obstacles to a new mom. Fold the laundry that has been in the dryer for two days, walk the dog and clean the litter box, run the dishwasher, pick up other children’s toys. Anything to make her life easier. Breastfed newborns feed every 2-3 hours, so mama should be able to rest while baby is napping.

5. Listen.

Sometimes a mom doesn’t want advice, she just wants someone to listen. Let her cry, yell and vent when she is frustrated. Hug her and let her know you are there for her.

What are some things that you found helpful as a breastfeeding mom? What kind of help do you wish you received?

Be sure to join us in our social media accounts to be up to date with the progress of our project!

And… Don’t forget to share your brelfies using our HT #BreastfeedingWorld 

–

[col1][/col1]

[col2][/col2]

[col3][/col3]

Gloria Brooks

I was born and raised in New Jersey, but now live in Tampa,FL with my husband David and 2 babies, Noah (2) and Cecelia (3 months). I went to the University of Florida to study special education and I’m currently an Autism teacher in Tampa. I’m currently extending my maternity leave to be home with my babies, and will return to teaching in January. Being a full time mommy right now is the most wonderful (and exhausting!) job in the world.

The post 5 Ways to Help a Breastfeeding Mom appeared first on Breastfeeding World.

Pregnant with Little Girl

After learning of that tiny, beautiful life growing inside of you, the questions start flowing.

When are you due?

Do you have a name picked out?

Are you finding out the sex of the baby?

Have you had any cravings?

How are you feeling?

Do you have a Doctor?

Are you planning on breastfeeding?

Are you planning on breastfeeding?

Its a difficult answer. How will you know if you will have any success at it? You have most likely heard of or read the amazing benefits to both you and baby. The convenience. The savings to your pocketbook! Undoubtedly, you have also heard the struggles.

If I can, I am going to try…

It is an answer I have heard many new mothers give, an answer I have given myself, while lovingly rubbing my belly and the growing life inside of me. It made sense for me, with the wonder that is pregnancy, the life that I sustained within me, to continue to feed and sustain with my body once she is no longer in my womb, but in my arms. If there was one thing I knew in all my experiences, research, and reading, it was that breastfeeding is natural.

What I didn’t know was that breastfeeding struggles are real.

Early Breastfeeding Struggles; What to Expect and Hot to Overcome them

When my children were born, the hospitals where I gave birth both encouraged a golden hour, time just for my baby, my husband and I, free of any medical interference, where we could practice skin to skin, bond, and nurse for the very first time. In the hospital, I was determined to make it work. Every time I went to latch my Daughter, every time, I called in a nurse to supervise. I wanted that latch to be perfect. I was determined to give my girl the best. With the help of a lactation consultant, a nipple shield, and my boppy, I was wheeled out of the hospital feeling confident.

Soaking in Baby Girl in the hospital

As ready as I thought I was, I was not prepared for the breastfeeding struggles we encountered those first few weeks and months. I was not prepared for the sore nipples that curled my toes with every latch. I was not prepared for blood from cracked nipples in  my breast pad. (My Lactation consultant assured me, keep applying Lanolin, pump that side to let it heal, and my baby girl would not turn into a tiny vampire with a taste for blood.) Most of all, I did not expect how constantly my daughter would need the comfort and sustenance that only I could give. In the hospital with my daughter, the lactation consultant told me, “Now do not be concerned if she only nurses for ten minutes. Ten minutes counts as a feeding.”

Ten Minutes my foot!

My little girl wanted to nurse for forty-five minutes, every hour and a half. That is taking into account that a nursing session is timed from the beginning of the feeding, meaning I had forty-five minutes between each feeding before my husband was bringing her to me “She’s hungry again. She needs a boob.” Six weeks Post Partum, I went back to work. I was lucky enough to be working as a nanny at the time, with a family with whom I consider my second family, and they allowed me to bring my girl to nurse. For all their compassion and understanding, even my second family didn’t understand my girl’s need to constantly suckle.

My very first Littles with my Little Girl

She is Still Nursing?”

Yes. Still nursing. Still hungry. Still Eating. Still. Still. Still.

Its overwhelming, being a new parent. Whether it be hormones or exhaustion, the incredible flux of emotion that goes through a new parents heart and body- the joy and incredible, consuming love- the pain and exhaustion, feeling completely touched out and depleted and guilty and at the same time incredibly strong and because somehow, through the constant feedings and nipple pain, wanting to give in to the ease of the bottle, waking up in puddles of milk from engorged breasts, somehow, you find that reserve of strength deep within you that can only be the strength of a mother and you Just. Keep. Going.

You keep going because as time moves on, as each growth spurt passes, your nipples get tougher, your feedings get more spaced apart, you hit a sweet spot. The moment where you realize that it was all worth it. where you don’t cringe when your baby needs to latch. Where you look forward to those peaceful , bonding moments between your child and yourself. Where you realize that all those early breastfeeding struggles were worth it. Where all those benefits you read of, the money saved, watching your baby plump up and knowing its because of you, all the reasons you chose to breastfeed don t even matter compared to the bond that you discover, that only you can provide this perfect sustenance to this perfect being-  the lazy, milk dribbled smiles your baby gives you in the middle of a feeding, nothing compares to the bond, the love between a mother and child- and it makes all  those breastfeeding struggles worthwhile.

Peek a Boo bonding during one of my nursing sessions with Little Man- no more nursing struggles here!

So keep trying, new mamas, don’t give up. Find a support group, whether at a meeting or online. Find a fellow nursing friend to reach out to. Read blogs, books, and reputable nursing sites. Talk to a lactation consultant (your insurance covers more than you think). You will get there, it will get easier, you will reach that sweet spot where everything will suddenly feel as natural as you thought it should of been all along. Soon it will be as if all those early breawstfeeding struggles never existed. You CAN do this, momma, you are not alone.

Share with us! What was your nursing relationship like with your newborn? What were some things that you struggled with in those early weeks of your breastfeeding relationship? Were you expecting breastfeeding to be easy? What tools did you utilize that helped make it better?

Be sure to join us in our social media accounts to be up to date with the progress of our project!

And… Don’t forget to share your brelfies using our HT #BreastfeedingWorld 

–

[col1][/col1]

[col2][/col2]

[col3][/col3]

Lauren Lewis

Lauren Lewis is no stranger to childcare development, having spent over 10 years as a nanny or family childcare provider. She’s the wife of a travel geek, mother of two vivacious children, and has an amazing talent for trailing lost things behind her a la Hansel and Gretel. Her passion for lifting up women and advocating for children pours out in her work as a Central Indiana Event Coordinator, Writer, and Social Media Relations Director for Breastfeeding World. Her life is full of busy, crazy and LOUD. It is full of love and hope, ups and downs. And coffee, always lots of coffee- but she wouldn’t have it any other way.

www.raisinglaurenslittle.wordpress.com

The post Early Breastfeeding Struggles appeared first on Breastfeeding World.

But, let’s be real…many breastfeeding journeys do not start out even close to any of those things.

The first three months of my troubled breastfeeding journey were extremely hard. From a bad latch and jaundice to a full body allergic reaction, to thrush and mastitis, to sore, cracked nipples and posterior tongue tie! We saw it all.

And we made it.

Is your wife, friend, daughter/daughter-in-law, sister, etc., struggling with breastfeeding? She will definitely need your support – but here are 10 things NOT to say to her.

1. “Breastfeeding shouldn’t hurt.”

Dealing with the pain of breastfeeding is both emotionally and physically difficult. We know that it should not hurt. We sometimes feel like our bodies are letting us down or that we are letting our babies down. We understand when it hurts, something is not right. We do not need to be reminded constantly that our bodies are wrong, because they are not. Breastfeeding CAN hurt. It hurts many women for many different reasons. So, what you can say instead of “breastfeeding shouldn’t hurt” is, “I am sorry you are having such pain breastfeeding – there has got to be a reason, let’s contact a lactation consultant and get to the bottom of this so you can start feeling better!”

2. “I think maybe your nipples are too big.”

Or too small. Just stay away from commenting on mom’s nipple size, please. We are already emotionally a wreck as we are trying to perfect this special bond and we do not need to feel as if our bodies are physically wrong. No nipple of any size will stop a baby from breastfeeding! If the mother thinks her nipples are the wrong size, she can check with her pediatrician or OB about this being the problem. We are not as comfortable as we look with being constantly topless around our daily visitors in the beginning, so don’t make this any worse than it is for us! If you see a troubled mom and think the nipple is the problem what you can say instead of commenting on the size or shape of mom’s nipple is, “I believe they sell something called a nipple shield that helps the baby latch well – would you like me to run out and get you one?”

3. “What have you eaten lately? Maybe the baby doesn’t like the taste?”

Most of us breastfeeding moms are educated and informed on what to eat and not to eat while breastfeeding. Telling us our babies may not like the taste of the milk we have produced is asinine! If you are worried we are eating improperly, buy us a book on healthy eating while nursing, but please do not shame the taste of our milk. That is most likely NOT the problem baby is having and our bodies have worked very hard to produce this milk! So instead, as said, buy us a nice healthy eating or recipe book for nursing moms, or better yet – cook us a healthy meal, quietly!

4. “I think your babies mouth is too small.”

Ugh, again with the size and shapes but this time of our babies! No, just do not! Do not tell us that our perfect little angel may have the wrong size mouth to breastfeed. If you are not educated on this matter – refrain from commenting on this altogether, but what you could say instead is, “Some babies have tongue tie or posterior tongue tie, which doesn’t allow their tongue to move as freely as it should while feeding. Have you asked your pediatrician to check for this or contacted a lactation consultant?”

5. “If you think it hurts now, wait ’til they get some teeth!”

NEVER! We as troubled nursers are already terrified that it will never get better, like they all say it does. Most of us may even be crying everyday and constantly on the verge of giving up. So please, do not discourage us further. If you have breastfed before and you know it gets better (because it really does!) you can tell us that for encouragement.

6. “Maybe you are not producing enough milk..”

Again, most of us are educated and informed on milk production. Our pediatricians, OB’s and lactation consultants can discuss this with us. This was one problem that I, fortunately, never had, but I did meet many moms while attending support groups who dealt with this. It is another issue that makes us feel our bodies are failing our babies, that we do not need you commenting on. If you are educated enough on the topic, what you can say is, “There are many recipes that are supposed to boost milk supply, let me bake you some lactation cookies and we will see if this helps! In the meantime, let’s call a lactation consultant and get some more ideas!”

7. “Your nipples just need to toughen up.”

This is just wrong. This suggests the mom should just wait it out and also sounds like we are going to have super hard and rough nipples which is not enthusing to us! There is most likely a problem that needs solving if there is nipple pain, and needing to “toughen up” is not it.

8. “Let me cover you up.”

Everything about nursing is uncomfortable right now. We need to watch our baby eat to try to find and fix the issue. We need to be comfortable especially in our own home and bond with our babies as much as we can while biting our tongue through the discomfort. If we are in our home, and you are a visitor, instead of saying this, you could say, “I will let you two be while you nurse…I will be in the other room, doing the dishes or folding your laundry, just holler if you want a blanket or a glass of water!”

9. “Why don’t you just pump instead?”

Genius! Because we NEVER would have thought of that! Of course we pump and for many reasons… build supply, more comfortable on nipples, baby needs milk NOW and isn’t latching… and many more. For me, it was a LIFESAVER. However, we still need to breastfeed in order for our babies (and ourselves) to properly learn. Also, our babies are way more effective in retrieving milk from our nipples then our pumps are. Oh and not to mention, if baby feeds every two hours, as most babies do in the beginning, you will have zero time to relax. I had to exclusively pump for days, sometimes a week in order to heal my nipples. My timeline went like this: Pump milk for a half hour (at least), transfer to bottle & feed baby (another half hour), burp baby and get baby to lay down, wash all pump parts and setup for next time to pump – Oh wait, it is time to pump again, already! Pumping, feeding, washing…it becomes a vicious cycle! So, instead of telling us to “just pump” you can kindly say, “I will wash and sanitize your breast pump parts in case you want a break later, they will be ready for you to use!” (Many new moms don’t know this, but, there are ways to rinse your pump parts and refrigerate them after use to save time)

10. Lastly, never, ever ask us, “Why don’t you just give your baby formula?”

Trust me, as someone who was on the verge of giving up on breastfeeding everyday for two and a half months, this is something we do not want to hear. We know that formula is out there and that it exists. We know many babies are formula fed and are just fine. We know many mothers who formula feed and we do not judge. But we want to breastfeed. We are determined and we are trying to stay encouraged. Personally, I had a free sample box of formula just 10 feet away in my cupboards the whole time, but never got to the point of using it. If and when we decide that we cannot handle the pain or troubles of breastfeeding any longer, we know where to find formula. Most of us who are in a constant battle of wondering how much longer we can go are already weighing the options of trying it. We know it is an option, we just are not ready to give up on our bodies. So, please do not even entertain the thought of formula to us, as we will make that choice on our own terms.

Did you have a rough start to breastfeeding? What were some of the things people said to you that got under your skin? Let us know!

If you are a beginner breastfeeding momma and battling with infections, bad latches, sore and cracked nipples, PPD, or anything bothering you, please reach out. Lactation consultants are amazing people, and a local breastfeeding support group will really open your eyes to how many women are dealing with the exact same issues as you.

And I promise, although I know it is very hard for you to believe at this time, it DOES get better.

Be sure to join us in our social media accounts to be up to date with the progress of our project!

And… Don’t forget to share your brelfies using our HT #BreastfeedingWorld

–

[col1][/col1]

[col2][/col2]

[col3][/col3]

Save

Save

Teresa Finocchio

I am a 27 year old first time mom who lives in New Jersey. I had an all natural planned homebirth with the help of water and the self-hypnosis hypnobabies method. I am currently a stay at home breastfeeding mother to my beautiful baby girl and I’ll be sharing with you all some personal experiences and covering some other interesting topics, stay tuned.

The post 10 things to NEVER say to a troubled breastfeeding momma! appeared first on Breastfeeding World.